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By Mike Hammer for Men's Life Today

Hey, Romeo! If your killer material gets nothing more than crickets over coffee with a girl you’ve been chasing … or if you can’t even get her to go out for coffee … it’s probably time for a reality check. That’s right: There are women out there who are impervious to your limitless charm.

Too many guys are caught up in the notion that a girl’s just playing hard-to-get if she’s not showing you love. That might sometimes be the case … or, more likely, you’re delusional. In the interests of Bro Code, we at Men’s Life Today consulted someone who’d know (a woman, and in this case, a woman who’s also a relationship expert) to identify six sure-fire signs that you’re wasting your time.

1.  You have a better relationship with her ringtone than with her.  If the only time you can ever get this girl on the phone is when you call her -- and if she seems surprised that it’s you when she finally answers -- you’ve got a bad connection! Face it: If she doesn’t call you back -- or ever call you at all -- she’s ducking you. “If you think she’s avoiding you, tell her that the next call has to come from her,” says Dr. JoAnn Magdoff, a psychologist and relationship expert. “If she doesn’t make it, you’ll have your answer.” In other words, it’s time to lose her phone number.

2.  She cuts you down with a crappy cliche.  When a woman utters the universal escape clause -- “I’m just not ready to be in a relationship” -- the most literal translation is: She’s not ready to be in a relationship with you. It could be that she’s got a lot on her plate, but in most cases, if she’s not buying what you’re selling now, she won’t be shopping in your store any time soon. “If you can hang on long enough, she might turn around,” says Magdoff. “But don't hold your breath.”

3. You can't find your way onto her calendar.

It’s easier to predict the monsoon than the next time this girl will be available to go out with you. She’s either “working late,” “gotta get up early,” “gonna be out of town,” or “giving blood.” And she always asks if she can get back to you in case she works things out at the last minute. Meaning: You’re twelfth man, and you’ll only get the call if her intended opening bowler gets injured. “These are the classic signs of being a fallback option,” explains Magdoff. “The only way to capture her imagination is to show less interest in her.”

"If a girl really wants to see you, she will not only make the time for it, but also be waiting impatiently for you to set a date," says Ravina Rawal, a Cosmopolitan contributor and editor of youth magazine Noise Factory. “If she seems unavailable, it's because she's just not interested.”

No. 4: She talks dirty... but not about you.

When she describes her fantasy man, it doesn’t sound like anybody who might ever be remotely mistaken for you. Or even speak to you. “If she’s describing her fantasies to you, and you’re not in them,” warns Magdoff, “you need to be talking to someone else.”

No. 5: The next time she laughs at one of your jokes will be the first time.

If you think you’re the king of comedy but can’t command even a couple of laughs from your intended queen, it’s time to take your Charlie Chaplin act on the road. “If she’s not finding your humour or personality interesting, you need to ask yourself what you find alluring about her,” says Magdoff. “Don’t get into this because you like a challenge.” Face it, funny boy: You’re chasing after somebody who’s laughing at you, not with you! (Sorry, we always wanted to use that one.)

Red Flag No. 6: She keeps telling you that you are so perfect for her sister!

Sadly, this is only a good thing if she’s siblings with Vidya Balan. On the other hand, says Magdoff, “Maybe it’s not such a bad idea to meet her sister. Let’s face it, you’re not getting anywhere with this girl!”

Mike Hammer is a former editor of Maxim, editor in chief of Stuff, and head guy of Shock.

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As I sat restlessly in the lobby of the hotel; waiting to reconnect with the charming stranger that I struck a connection with on flight; I couldn’t help but run through various scenarios in my mind.  After all I am a planner – I can think of most ways something can work or go horribly wrong.

Airport Boy had initiated the first physical contact between him and I – from the hand holding to the kiss.  He had suggested meeting up again; and during our sleepy text exchange even suggested spending half a day together.  I was the one however to call him back when we couldn’t find a way to meet up on his 2nd day in the city and asked him if was game to meet up for breakfast or a coffee before his flight out.

My phone was still dead and getting a charge courtesy of the sweet trainee at the business center; I felt like a teenager wondering if her date would show up .. and then it struck me ..

What if … he never got the message I sent him the night before ? He had mentioned that he was giving his Sim card back.  But then surely, whoever had the phone would see the message and convey it to him.  Even if he didn’t get my message; since he did ask him to specify a location and time to meet – he could always call me from any phone including his international line as he had my business card.

I on the other hand – had nothing other than his FaceBook account info; his local number which he no longer had; and his email address.  How was I even to attempt to get in touch with him ?  A FB message seemed ridiculous (what if he didn’t have the app installed on his phone ?).  He had mentioned he had an android phone – which from what I understood was just as good as a smart phone … and that’s when I decided to email him …

A short simple message letting him know that I hoped he got my message ‘cos I was waiting at the hotel and it would be great to see him .. and if he didn’t get it (which would suck), then I wish him a safe flight.

15 minutes.  30 minutes. 45 minutes.  1 hour 15 minutes go by and there is no sign of the guy.  More thoughts going through my mind.  What if he got really wasted at the wedding party, over slept and rushed off to catch his flight ?  What if there was no land line at the place he was staying at ?  What if he did get my message but ended up at the wrong hotel ?

I guess he never got my message.  I couldn’t believe I had driven an hour out of my way to meet a guy (who I didn’t even know had or had not gotten my message) with no way to contact him.  The two of us managed to miss our connection – whatever it was. 

I suppose everything does happen for a reason ?  It might have been too much to ask (or assume) that Airport Boy actually received that text message  and was making his way over to meet for a quick chat before flying off.  Maybe I should have just called him instead of messaging him the night before (especially since I really don’t like texting at all).  I was annoyed with myself for not having done that.  I just took it for granted that he ‘would’ receive the message.  Damn, I could have even gone to the airport gate since I knew his flight departure time but then didn’t want to seem like a crazed stalker (which I am most definitely NOT) ..

So many if’s, but’s, could have, maybe’s … Oh well – maybe when he finds a spare moment – he will reply to my email and then I’ll know what happened that morning.  Should be interesting to know his side of the story.

Have you ever crossed the city to meet someone ? Or experienced anything like this where you genuinely felt there was a connection with another person ? It felt like a blind-date (even though I’d met him before) and perhaps for a minute I even felt vulnerable at the fact that there I was, waiting, by myself in a hotel lobby looking out for a stranger to walk through the door.

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I found myself at the airport in Dubai almost panicking because I couldn’t see my scheduled flight. Not that I minded staying back but NC would have killed me if I didn’t get on this flight.

I had been bumped off my original flight; and then the seat I had the following day was changed to a later flight – first 3 p.m, then 11 p.m, and then 3 a.m.  At about 1 a.m I’m wandering around the airport trying to figure out when the hell my flight was. At about 2:30 a.m, I see the notice that the flight has been delayed further to about 5 a.m ! Not a good sign considering I’d been awake since 6 a.m that morning and getting fairly cranky and hungry too !

To make things worse – my Wifi wasn’t working. After checking with the information booth who claimed that it was definitely working – I walked back towards my gate and just to double check – asked the only non-creepy looking guy whether his Wifi was working. It was .. but no matter what I did – my laptop refused to connect.

I don’t know why – but I went back to the guy (lets refer to him as Airport Boy) to ask him if it was still working. Ended up sitting a seat away from him whilst he offered to figure out what seemed to be the problem with my laptop connection but to no avail.

We did end up chatting though – right until we boarded the flight. Funnily we were on the same row but on opposite sides; and he signals for me to come and join him. Which I do. We continue chatting away like old friends. And then, I realize that he’s oh-so-lightly stroking my hand – not quite sure how to react – I just went with the flow.

Before I know it – Airport Boy has leaned over, cupped the side of my face and kissed me. Now that’s one way of shutting me up !! (I’ve been told that I can talk … a lot) It wasn’t an aggressive kiss, far from that – borderline gentle but completely in control. He did mention that his plan was to get the two of us banned from the airline so we would never have to face such awful flight delays again !! (but seriously I don’t mind a flight delay if the benefits involve impromptu kisses from a cute stranger)

We continue chatting as if this is all quite the norm and are decidedly quite comfortable with one another. I like that in a man – confidence, sharp and a sense of humour. I also liked the fact that I didn’t have to do anything other than initiate the first bit of conversation. The feeling of knowing someone is showing an obvious interest and actually doing something about it … now that’s flattering. (compared to some of the crazy men I’ve met over the past 3 years – this was refreshing!)

Of course the surreal flight has to come to an end – but luckily his charm didn’t flat line once we landed and got out towards immigration.  For the first time, I was grateful for luggage delays and between a few quick hugs and some playful cheek punches – the two of us managed to find our way to the taxi stand for the inevitable goodbye.

So there we were – two strangers who found some sort of a connection on a flight – trying to figure out a way to meet again.  He had 2 days in the city before flying back out – and I had work to do – yet the two of us seemed to ‘want’ to find a way to meet again.  Numbers were exchanged; tentative plans were made – a parting hug, a quick kiss and we were both on our separate paths.

On my ride home – I thought about what had happened over the past few hours and couldn’t quite believe it.  It made me smile and I liked that.  I knew I’d like to see him again – if anything for the great company (although there could be the chance that he might just blank me out) – but its just one date (kinda) – no harm in asking / following through right ?

Has that happened to you ? Ever meet someone in the most unexpected place and just ‘click’ at some level or the other ?  It still feels quite surreal when I think about it … I mean, really – that actually happened …