It’s Just ONE Date – Go For It !

By | 09:19 Leave a Comment

I recently came upon a few articles that promoted the ‘One Date Rule’ and it got me thinking. 

There’s nothing wrong with accepting a date with a man / woman who ASKS you.  By ‘ask’ I mean someone who has the balls / guts to pick up the phone and have a real conversation with you and tells you that ‘hey would you like to go out for _____ (dinner, coffee, jazz concert in the park, some sort of activity) on X Day at Y Time’.

If someone can pull up the courage (yes it takes courage to ‘ask’ someone these things) to ‘ask’ you out then you should apply the one-date rule and go out with them.  That person deserves the chance to take you out and show you what a date can really be like.  Even if that person doesn’t fall into the category of the ‘type’ of person you are attracted to.  

Side Note : according to some groups of people it is acceptable to ask someone out via email, text message, BBM, WhatsApp and even Skype ! So I guess that means you can give them a chance too.  (not that I approve this practice at all)

After all -  the guy / girl could turn out to be cuter than you remember / better than their photograph from the online dating site.  You could have the best time ever.  You could both get along like a house on fire.  You could both end up totally smitten with each other.  You might even discover your soul mate.

datingcartoon47What’s the worst thing that can happen ?  Lack of chemistry / absolutely no compatibility and therefore no chance of a 2nd date.  Or he/she could just be a more subdued (i.e boring) than their online avatar ? 

In the very rare (and extreme case) the person turns out to be some sort of psychotic serial killer who spends the evening trying to find ways to torture you.  

But you won’t know whether you are going to enjoy the date or get bored out of your mind until you actually decide to go on the date.  It doesn’t have to be a heavy duty date – just the basic first date.

So why not give it a shot – the next time someone asks you out (phone, BBM, whatsapp, text message, or email) – just be a sport and go for it.  You might just have a ton of fun, make a new friend or find a pea for your pod.  Worst case scenario – you’ll cuss me if you have a horrid time (but I can live with that) for suggesting going in the first place.

Do you have any dating rules that you follow ? Have you perhaps applied the ‘one date rule’ at some point in your dating history ?

Further Reading :

  1. The One Date Rule : Why I’ll Go Out With Anyone Who Asks Me by Chiara Atik
  2. The One Date Rule, Revisited: Why You Should Always Go on That First Date by Chiara Atik
  3. To Feign Interest or Cut Him Off At the Knees ? by Mishi
  4. The Basics by Simone Grant 

Comments (10)

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My gay bf suggests this as well - go out with everyone who asks you, because you never know. I don't actually go out with EVERYONE, but I do go out with people who I feel kinda lukewarm about, just to give them a chance.
1 reply · active 740 weeks ago
I hear ya on this. I wouldn't go out with 'everyone' either - but yeah, as long as there's something remotely 'lukewarm' (fab word in this context actually) - I could do it. Given the limited choices available to me in Bombay, I have to bite the bullet and see what's out there - even if its not my preferred dish on the menu
Abhishek MEHRA's avatar

Abhishek MEHRA · 740 weeks ago

DC, u have no idea wat uve done...

as if u didnt have enuff crazies in ur life!!!

wish u luck :-p

AM
1 reply · active 740 weeks ago
AM .. hahah I know I thought about this before posting .. I've opened Pandora's Box .. and that's why I have you in my life to help me save myself from the crazies !! Reinforcements baby !!!
haha.. nice!! Tho I must beg to differ a little... while theoretically pertinent, I guess what matters most is what stage of life you're in. If you're in the late-teens to mid-twenties bracket, you have the time and the inclination to meet new people, even at the risk of ruining/wasting a perfectly good evening. Early 30's like me.. I think more often than not, the thought process is" do I really have that much time to spare"??

Oh and I would have to agree with Abhishek, BIG MISTAKE putting this up for the world to read!! Once word gets around, ur social calendar is gonna be booked big time... all for the sake of the "one date rule"!! :)
@ Ve ... I do agree with you; and I don't ... but I do at the same time .. make any sense ? Its funny how this post came about - and whilst I realize at this particular point in my life (I'm 29) I don't really have the time or the energy to spare an evening; at the same time - I do need to meet some 'outside' people .. 'cos my job is already so social; despite always meeting new people; I'm not dating anyone because they are in my social circle, or are potential clients; or potential business acquaintances ...

So I suppose I have to look it at as - if someone makes the effort to actually ask me out - I can spare 30 minutes minimum for a coffee right ? I could always look at it as being stuck in traffic if I don't enjoy it hahah (ok that's kinda mean but you get my drift)
I agree, at the end of the day what do you really have to lose by going on just one basic date? You could end up surprising yourself... If you're not having a good time, make a polite excuse and leave. One date does not mean that you are commiting yourself to anything other than a date.
1 reply · active 739 weeks ago
Exactly my point. The most you lose is 30 minutes or an hour of your time. I've noticed that in Bombay - guys are weary of 'dating' because they feel that a girl wants something 'more than dating' .. and because no one knows how to communicate face-to-face - those intentions are never clear to either party 'cos really how on earth is one to supposed to figure out the hidden meanings behind emoticons and LOL's in SMS / BBM / Whatsapp / Emails / FB msgs !
yeah I guess what you say makes sense.. if someone's taken the effort to put themselves out there, in a bid to share a couple of hours with you coz they think it could lead somewhere, taking 30 mins out of your schedule to have a coffee wont really hurt that much after all!!

btw, if you do start accepting these coffee invitations, imagine how much fodder for your blog that would make!! ;)
1 reply · active 739 weeks ago
Hmmm if I was being asked to coffees then I would have great blog fodder - so lets see what this churns out and you'll be the first to know of my coffee adventures :P

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