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I’ve been feeling like this all day. I can’t believe I have to leave. I don’t want to but I have to. The very thought of having to leave London, pains me. The ache that I have in my heart is just something I can’t even begin to explain.
I know I said I would stop complaining – and this isn’t a complaint, this is rationalizing and coming to a realization. Over the last few years, after setting up base in India, in some ways I have become very cynical, and I’ve been unhappy at some level. I’ve known this.
Being back in London opened a flood gate of memories; cleared the path to the old me – the me that I lost somewhere in transition. The time spent with close friends is something I treasure deeply and I hadn’t realized just how much I missed being around them.
I can’t stop the tears rolling down my face … because I know I won’t be the same person once I leave .. but I’m going to try to hold on to that.
Logging you in...
Prutha · 654 weeks ago
i wonder, if i am trying too hard to hold on to the person that i was back in paris, (and i turn into all over again every time i visit..) i wonder if that is one of the reasons for the tiny bit of unhappiness ?
at times like these, i wish a teleport or even a tardis actually existed...
PS: hope you had a fantastic time there...and that you are coming back with fresher memories to make you smile during the mad times in bombay ;)
PPS: i have been reading (and contemplating on) all your posts, just haven't had the time to comment :(
love,
Prutha
dazediva 75p · 654 weeks ago
I hear you totally. I have been struggling with the same thought for a while; and perhaps that is why I have that hint of unhappiness.
My trip has been fantastic - and apparently I have come back here with a positive attitude - so lets hope that lasts for a while :)
I'm so glad you have enjoyed all the posts; would love to hear your thoughts on them via the comments whenever you get a chance.
p.s. seeing your comment pop up on my email totally had me smiling away; always look forward to hearing from you xx