Let The Sluts Walk !

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For those of you that might have been asleep or missed out on this widely talked about event … S.L.U.T.W.A.L.K has been a trending topic on social networks since April; when the first Slutwalk took place in Toronto; and now it has found its way to Delhi.

It began on 24 January this year, when policeman Michael Sanguinetti walked into the Osgoode Hall Law School in Toronto, to tell women how to avoid sexual violence. "I've been told I'm not supposed to say this," Sanguinetti said. "However, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimised."

And this is why Slutwalk Delhi that is due to take place on 25th June is important !! Indian society tends to blame the woman for any assault or rape.  It’s always the woman who was ‘asking for it’ because she was out late, or she was alone, or she was dressed in a particular way.  Women are the one who are ostracized and out casted in society if they have been victims of sexual assault and rape.  WHY ??

Slut Does Not Mean Whore

First of all – what is a slut ?  We as a society have changed the meaning of the the word slut to suit ourselves.  A slut for some means women who get too much attention; one suggests that slut is a woman with the morals of a man; for others its a woman who sleeps around; but pray tell – why is the word being used just for women ??

In the olden days, it used to mean someone who was dirty, unkempt; and later the Oxford dictionary defined it as someone with more than one sexual partner.  So I suppose all of us – men & women – are sluts if we have had more than one sexual partner.  

Why is it okay for a man to sleep with multiple women and be called a stud; but if a woman decides to sleep with more than one man she’s a slut / whore / and considered ‘easy’ ??   It’s NOT okay and we need to just grow the hell up and accept that in today’s day and age, everyone has a past, everyone has multiple partners, and it’s not something you should judge a person by !

N0 = NO.  Any Time. Every Time.

Just because nowadays, we, particularly women,  are more in charge of our sexual lives does not mean that it’s a green light to sexual assault.  When a woman says NO – it means NO.  Doesn’t matter what your mind thinks – NO = NO ! realmentakeno

To put it bluntly – ANYONE can get rape or sexually abused and victimized.  Man, Woman, Boy, Girl, even babies !! Yes there are some sick people out there.  Yes there is ‘male rape’ too . Which child of 8 years or 10 years goes around ‘provoking’ someone to sexually abuse or assault them ? What defence does a 2 year old child have ? For that matter – what defence does a 80 year old grandma have ? There was a recent case in Delhi where a 70 year old woman was raped !! Was granny parading around in her skimpiest best ‘asking for it’ ?

When I first moved to India almost 4 years ago, I got warned by everyone I know that I should never go to Delhi alone; that it was the ‘rape capital’ of the country; that Delhi was considered to a dangerous city for women.  I never quite believed it – but the latest police figures indicate that a woman is raped every 18 hours in Delhi.  That’s insane !! No wonder my mother panics at the thought of me going off to spend a few days in Delhi.  She just doesn’t know ‘what could’ happen. 

Whilst I’m really excited that finally – the women of India – especially Delhi – will get a chance to stand up for their rights of being able to walk the streets without being victimized; it really irks me the way some people (including some women) – especially men – are reacting to it.

I wanted to take a club and smash a few heads on Twitter yesterday based on the tweets I was reading.  There were men who were just  trivializing the entire concept of Slutwalk; using it as a form of very bad puns and generally being quite disgusting about it.   Just the fact that men are making a joke about ‘how much would they have to pay for a slut’ makes me want to take a knife, slice their d*cks and chop their balls !! Yup I said that – and I’d do it too.

man slutGuys – don’t you have a mother, sister, wife or daughter ? How would you like it if another man tried to verbally or physically assault them ? Wouldn’t you want to tear that monster from limb to limb for touching your family ? Or would you blame your sister, wife, daughter for provoking a man into believing that they wanted to get harassed, leered and even raped ?

Instead of making lewd comments and jokes about such a strong subject, shouldn’t you be out there with your female friends, sisters, aunts, daughters and mothers supporting them ??  I’m proud of the fact that all my guy friends who were in Toronto and London were a part of SlutWalk.

Here’s A Thought For Men

How would you like to be violated and have an unwanted penis rip open your anus and treat you like a piece of meat ?  The thought makes you shudder doesn’t it ??  Now multiply that an infinite time and that’s what a woman goes through every time she is violated verbally or physically.  Sexual assault is NOT a joke .

Do you even realize what it feels like to be stared at like a piece of meat that could be pounced upon ? Do you ever walk out of the house thinking ‘oh shit, maybe I should have worn jeans instead of shorts’ ? Do you make sure to lock your car door the minute you get into it ? Do you check the back seat of your car before you lock yourself in the car ? Do you switch your car light on when passing a police check so that the male cops don’t stop you ? Do you grab your back pack and squeeze your body tight whilst you try to walk past the crowd hoping that no one tries to grab your ass or brush against your chest ?

NO – you probably don’t have to do that.  So WHY should a woman have to do that ? I’m a modern woman used to living across the globe and yet in what should be my ‘mother land’ – I walk around concerned about how people are leering at me; and how I have had to slap some guys for brushing up against me inappropriately on an empty road. 

Are You Walking With The Sluts ?

slutwalk_descriptionSlutWalk is a movement for freedom of expression; including freedom of sexual expression.  By using the word ‘slut’ – we are coming together to take back the social meaning that has been assigned to the word.  For all of those making lewd jokes about SlutWalk – the more you keep at it – the more people become aware about it.  It’s only been a few days – but women (and men) across India – especially in the metro cities – are waking up and expressing themselves. 

So what if the uncles, aunties, and the more prudish amongst society are trying to turn a blind eye to what is really going on – it’s up to US – Gen Y and Gen Z to make a difference.  It’s up to us to stand up for the right to be able to express ourselves.  It’s up to us to educate others around us that it’s NOT acceptable to play the blame game on assault victims. 

For all the women and men who will be participating in SlutWalk Delhi - ‘hats off to you all’ for being a part of this global movement.

Further Reading …

  1. Her Dress Is Not A Yes
  2. Of Sluts & Walks
  3. For The Love Of Sluts
  4. Slutwalk TO: It Rocked
  5. I Became A Slut At The Age of 10 
  6. Why Men Should Join SlutWalk