Here’s one for the Diva’s Dating Diary (I really should make a chart for 2012 but that’s another post altogether)
How It Began
About 3 weeks ago, I went out with a girlfriend for the launch of a new club in Bombay. We were looking fab and dancing the night away. This one guy caught my attention towards the end of the night – he was looking straight at me through 10 feet of writhing bodies and when I locked eyes with him – he looked away. And I laughed which I assume embarrassed him just a bit – because every time he looked up and caught my eye – he couldn’t maintain eye contact.
I found this pretty amusing and actually pointed at him and indicated that he should come over to where I was. Typical Bombay boy, he didn’t and looked even more flustered (heaven forbid a woman is direct!). At this point I just got bored and went back to dancing with my girlfriend.
Whilst waiting for my car – I saw the guy again and this time he did approach me and we struck up a conversation, exchanged phone numbers but not before he asked for my BBM pin. Seriously what the hell happened to just taking a phone number down ?
The Problem
The next day, this lad drops me a half dozen text messages which included (and I quote) “C U Sometime at your comfort”, until I tell him that it’s a lot easier to have a conversation on the phone (my pet peeve is constant texting / bbm’s instead of a quick phone call). 2 hours later he gets his ass in gear and calls me (but not before we play phone tag for another half hour or so).
Plus points to him for actually trying to fix a date; more plus points when he did fix a day to meet to up. I asked him what he fancied doing and he says …
“I thought you could come over to my place, watch a movie and you can cook me lunch”
Errrrrrrrrm NO. Minus points all around. Seriously – the logistics of this suggestion involve me traveling from one side of the city to the back end of the suburbs to cook for him with absolutely zero effort on his part ! Why on earth would I want to cook lunch (or any meal) for a man I do not know and at his house the first time I ever meet him ?? Not a smart thing for any girl to do on a 1st date (unless you have some history with the man). Cooking involves slaving over the heat in the kitchen (and with temperatures hitting 40 degrees Celsius in Bombay that is NOT something I want to be doing) AND end up smelling like food !! Appealing – No way !
I provided an alternative option of going out somewhere to eat but he wasn’t having it. Cheap alert perhaps ? Or then again it could have to do with the fact that he’s a 24 year old model who thinks he’s being cute ! *yeah right*
Needless to say – that date never happened. The party was on a Thursday, he rang me on Friday, we’d fixed up to meet the following Tuesday and like most of the Bombay boys – he never quite followed through to the end. A request on his part to reschedule but that didn’t happen either. Although I got a text message the weekend after asking what I was up to and when I would be cooking for him !! My response – I’ll send you some take-out / delivery options !
Diva’s Verdict
Guys – don’t ask a girl to cook for you on the first few dates. You may not realize this but cooking for someone is quite an intimate affair – and if you haven’t got a history together, it could turn out to be a bit of a disastrous meal !! Ask her out, take her out (this does not mean it has to be fancy), show her that you’re into her and if you play your cards right – she might show off her cooking skills or better yet, if you’re really lucky, she’ll serve you breakfast in bed !
Side Note : I don’t have a problem with cooking a meal for a guy – but that’s at a later stage of having been together i.e few dates at least / a boyfriend .. definitely not the first time I am meeting him. Now if HE offered to cook for me (or vice versa) that’s a different story … but this was just a bit lame (even though my mates reckon he wanted to actually indulge in Naked Master Chef)