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Do you know what the word Serendipity means ?  It’s such a sweet sounding word right ?  It means – a fortunate accident.  Dictionary.com describes it as an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident.   Wikipedia states Serendipity is the effect by which one accidentally discovers something fortunate, especially while looking for something else entirely.

 

I was flicking channels earlier today and came across the movie Serendipity – which is a movie that I’ve always been fascinated by.  I watched it – after quite a few years; and it mad me smile back to a few incidents over the past few months; and made me very glad for my actions of last night.

 

Quite a few months back – I met SK – and it was an entirely random encounter.  We had met online; got talking online; eventually graduated to text messages and then finally on the phone.  We had not ‘met’ each other as yet.  So we met.  We had planned to go for a long drive and just chat.  Driving anywhere in Bombay can become a long drive – but we were being adventurous – let’s go somewhere else.

 

I basically drove almost 100 km outside of the city limits with a complete and utter stranger who I did not know anything about aside from what he had told me online and on texts etc.   I even lay flat down on the curve of an uphill road risking being run over by cars that could be driving around.

 

The reason I tell you about SK is because he introduced me to the concept of metaphysics.  You have probably heard the term – but may not know about it  - I was pretty clueless about the subject myself.   SK has now started a Blog which I would definitely recommend checking out when you get a chance.

 

Here’s an excerpt from his blog which really touched something inside of me.  I have been feeling restless and slightly incomplete; in the sense that I have been wanting to do something but haven’t done it – and after reading SK’s blog – I knew I just had to do whatever it was that was on my mind.

 

Whether its praise, love, criticism, money, time, space, power, punishment, sorrow, laughter, care, pain, or pleasure… the more you give the more you will receive..

So indulgence is the best thing to do…

Don’t say No… Just go into it and experience the moment….

It’s just being like a river… Following a direction … keep flowing… you may wander different routes but you will reach the ocean at last (that’s the goal)… but if you go stagnant… there will be dirt settling over you….

A flowing river always depicts strength, beauty, health, and freshness…
So we just need to flow… Never stop… do everything that comes your way… coz if it’s come in your way… It’s for you…

 

Pretty deep huh ?  As I said – these words struck a chord somewhere inside of me; and that in turn has helped me settle the internal volley of words going on inside of my head and I have finally taken my own self-advice.

 

I emailed the man.  I just put my thoughts out on paper (well on gmail) and have sent it across to him via cyber space and told him how I feel and that it would be nice to know how he feels about the situation.   I don’t know if I will hear from him; if he will ever respond; but at least I have done what I had to do and told him.  Now it’s up to life – fate – destiny – karma – whatever you want to call it – to determine the outcome.

 

I sent that email around 4 a.m yesterday; and now I feel like my Facebook status … I am letting myself go to the universal energy flows … wonder what this ride is gonna be like !!

 

The series of events which led me to send that email included having written the email almost 3 weeks ago but never actually sending it out; then reading SK’s blog the night before; finally being able to just send the email out; and to top it off – watching the movie Serendipity today post the email etc. 

 

Here’s a memorable quote from the movie which I feel sums up how I feel about my actions.

 

Life is not merely a series of meaningless accidents or coincidences, but rather, it's a tapestry of events that culminate in an exquisite sublime plan.

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The heart says
Look here ....
The head says
No, look there ...

The head and heart
all part of the same body
but are practically
miles apart

The head
seeks structure
The heart
craves adventure

Sometimes, I believe
the head and heart
want the same thing

But with a deep sigh,
as if weighed down,
the heart must listen
to the head

Why does the
head and heart
battle so ?

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It’s been just over 2 years since I found what most would describe as ‘love’. When I first encountered this emotion – I was confused; ecstatic and elated all at the same time.

We spent almost all our waking moments together and if that wasn’t enough to smother us - the nights as well.

Alas like all good things, the honeymoon period often comes to an end. The last year has been a roller coaster journey – trying to smoothen out any glitches, determining where our compatibilities have gone wrong, and what could be done to fix the issues.

Work was taking a toll on both of us – the long hours, the stress and strain of daily commuting – conversation seemed to just revolve around ‘work’. We even tried to take a few short breaks – just a little getaway so that the days didn’t begin with a frantic rush to check emails ! The only use for touching the laptop would be to update our FaceBook status; upload new photos from the holiday or listen to some tunes.

But there was still a strain … the relationship was getting older, the hums of the past were now a buzzing sound to my ears; the lazy morning stretch to start up was now just frustrating; even more annoying now was that I could ‘see’ him just zoning off and switching off without notice causing embarrassment amongst my friends. Just how often could I keep explaining why he would switch off from a conversation !

I was even finding myself distracted by others – it was as if temptation had embedded itself into me … I tried not to look – the loyal person that I am – but with so many new faces suddenly giving me the attention that I had been missing out on – it was hard not to do …

I even thought of therapy – counselling of sorts – maybe we just needed a different perspective. After a few months of therapy, I realised there was only one way to go … we needed to part ways …

It was difficult to do as there was so much that we had shared together … Then the painful process of dividing and taking back our personal belongings. It took hours to sort out. I even drove to see him leave … this was yesterday …

When he was out of my line of vision – I turned back towards my car – and it felt like I had been struck by lightening in broad day light. The vision that had been tempting me for months now – I saw him ever so often and would avoid eye contact. But today – I could not avoid it – as he was staring right at me.

I took a deep breath – and calmly walked over – checking him out. He just stood there – sleek and trim – with the air of one who knows he has it all going on for him. I never thought I would say these words – but I did.

‘How Much ?’

Was I that desperate ? Did I really need to do this ? Couldn’t I just wait ??

I took the cash out of my wallet – and handed it over along with my home address. ‘Meet me in an hour – I’ll be waiting for you’.

I wasn’t disappointed. He turned up. Looking even better than he did when I saw him earlier.

Have a look and tell me what you think ….

I found love in the latest Dell Inspiron 15.6” with a 350GB HD and 3GB Ram :)

What were YOU thinking :P

dates dating life love men reflections relationships thoughts women

There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection.

As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.

Source Unknown

When was the last time you went out on a ‘real date’ ? You know the type that I’m talking about … where you make an effort to get ready and spray on that special perfume/cologne … When was the last time you made an effort to surprise your 'date' ?

Sometimes I feel as if the whole idea behind dating and what comprises of a date – is almost an alien thought to quite a few people.

Wikipedia describes ‘dating’ as ...

a social activity performed as a pair or even a group with the aim of each assessing the other's suitability as their partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse. The word refers to the act of agreeing on a time and "date" when a pair can meet and engage in some social activity.

In many cultural traditions, dates are arranged by a third party, who may be a family member, an acquaintance, or a dedicated matchmaker. Recently matchmaking services have become popular. Although dating rules in Western popular culture have become more relaxed during the 20th century, there is considerable variation between individuals' values.

For example, when the activity costs money, it has traditionally been the man's role to pay (which naturally causes a problem for same-sex couples on a date); in recent times the practice of "going Dutch" (splitting the expenses) has emerged. Traditional dating activities include sharing entertainment or a meal. In general, a person may date many different partners during the same time period in order to have the best chance of finding their most suitable available mate.

Whilst talking to a friend of mine online today – the topic of dating came up in the context of a completely different conversation (which deserves a post on itself) … I went on in my own words to describe a date as “possibly best defined as a preset arrangement between two people who are looking to get to know each other better .. Normally involving a pick-up from the residence, a meal (breakfast/lunch/dinner/coffee/dessert - any of them), but then again it could be as simple as going for a walk in the park and having a picnic”

So now you must be wondering – why on earth am I ranting about ‘dating’ .. it does appear that know what the definition of a date is .. so why the topic … reason being is that in the last one year I have not been on a single outing with a member of the opposite sex who does appear to be genuinely attracted to me which I can actually call ‘date-worthy’!!

Don't get me wrong - I've met some very nice guys over the past year - all of whom have shown substantial interest in me - and have gone about doing the right things in terms of how they act, and what they say, how they behave around your friends etc ... and yet when it comes to the crunch of actually putting into action the 'date' (which by the way - they persist on) ... it's just a complete flop show !

Typical scenario ...

Boy : I really enjoyed hanging out with you tonight - how does dinner mid-week sound ?

Girl : Yeah it was fun :) Dinner sounds great.

A few days later and the week is coming to an end .. you're wondering if the guy even remembers asking you to make plans for dinner

Or vice versa (see I'm not sexist - the concept of dating applies to both men & women) ... a friend of mine - a charming young man (and really he's a man) - met a girl a few weeks back; they exchanged numbers at a party after getting along pretty well and we all noticed her giving him the green signal !

So during the course of the week, this guy kept calling the girl to take her out for dinner - and what does she go and do ? Avoid / miss the calls; appears to be busy when she's speaking to him ... and yet stringing him along and saying that they'll meet for dinner etc ... That's just rubbish .. if you can't accept the dinner invitation - at least have the courtesy to tell the poor man that you're interested ! Instead of having him waste his time trying to find a time to meet with you !

Pathetic isn’t it ? What is so hard about the concept of going on a date ?

1. Pick up the phone and call a member of the opposite sex that you are attracted to and would like to get to know
2. Ask that person if they would like to go out for a meal / coffee / dessert or even a round of mini-fun golf ! But ask them to go out with you !
3. Once that’s done .. specify a time and day that you would like to meet up on
4. Turn up to pick the person up on the set day and time (arriving a little bit earlier never hurt anyone) ! Don’t make them come over to you (unless you really live on opposite sides of the city and transportation becomes a hassle)
5. Do not show up wearing your Sunday Scruffies … try to make some sort of effort in your appearance and you might find yourself in the good books
6. Always offer to drop the person home - you never know what's in store for you :)

Whilst a friend of mine was visiting the city - she went out on a 'real date' .... the type where the guy calls her up and makes a plan for an evening during the week; she got dressed up and wore one of her best outfits; the guy came over to pick her up (dressed very slick might I add) and had his driver for the night; took her to a great restaurant with lovely ambiance; then took her out dancing where they met up with some other friends; and dropped her back home.

Now THAT's what you call a real date ... where both parties have put in an effort to enjoy an evening together whereby they can get to know each other. It's not like you're meeting a 'buddy' for a drink !!!