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The more we wonder about the "whys / what ifs"  when it comes to our past - the more likely we are to do a quick u-turn and find ourselves in the same situation as if in a time loop. 

In order to avoid doing so - we must make a conscious choice to keep moving forward and not be dragged back into the past. 

I apply this thought process to pretty much everything I do - even when it comes to personal relationships with people.  If I don't think someone is right for me overall - I let go and just move forward.  I don't spend too much time dwelling because there's no point in it.  

If something isn't working out for you - regardless of the situation i.e. work / personal life / education etc chalk out your options / alternatives and strive forward.  Once you've made that choice - don't dwell on the past.  This is when applying the 3 C's of Life will help you : make a choice to take a chance to change your life ! 

How do you stop yourself from looking back ? How do you stay focused on the future and not linger on the past ? 
Have you ever found yourself wondering 'what if' ... Whenever I find myself doing that I remind myself that at that stage in my life - it was my conscious choice to follow a certain path or to make a certain decision.  It was all in my control and I chose to do whatever it was that has eventually bought me to where I am.

I believe in speaking my mind - I don't believe in holding back.  I have had some interesting adventures over the years.  I've made life altering decisions by packing up & moving from London to Bombay and shuffling my life like one would a deck of cards.  When it comes to dating or pursuing relationships; be it confessing about a crush on someone or even connecting with a stranger on a flight  - I've taken those chances just so that I'm not wondering 'what if'.    

I'm living life on my terms.  And hopefully in the process will leave no room for regret when I look back at where I am.  The next time you find yourself wondering 'what if' - just stop and if it's something you really want to do; just take baby steps towards it.  [On a serious note if you're depressed and / suicidal - please talk to someone and don't do anything you will actually regret] 

If you have a goal - strive towards it because it sure as hell isn't going to swagger over to you.  If you see someone attractive or wearing amazing clothes - just say something to them and make their day - who knows what a compliment can lead to.  

Do you regret any chances that you didn't take ? What about all the things you did that you wouldn't change if given the chance to ? 
I've never been one to listen to music with 'lyrics' or 'words' - and my friends tease me immensely about this.  But when I do listen to music with lyrics - I can relate to it .. and I mean really relate to it. 

 Have you ever come across a piece of music of really touches you ? I mean to the core ? Leaves you with goose bumps or even slightly teary eyed ?  Have you ever felt that a song captures the exact feeling that you wish to convey or captures your emotions completely ? Please do share your favourite track so that I can have a listen too ! 

 So why not put aside a few minutes today (after all it is a Monday) and just lie down & listen to good music :) I'd like to recommend Deepak Chopra feat Demi Moore - Desire ; Wolfsheim - Dream of You and Deep Dish - Can You Feel it 
Can we really manage our expectations of those around us ?  This is a subject that has been on my mind for a while now and I really went into it last year during the UBC where I wrote a post titled 'To Expect or Not To Expect?'

I really feel that nowadays people just don't value those around them and hence everyone has sort of let their personal expectations just fall atrociously.  

I've always believed that if you want to get something done - then you ought to do it yourself for the best results (unless of course it's something you realistically cannot do e.g carpentry work in my case).  I've also learned over the last decade or so that people will somehow disappoint you if you don't manage your expectation levels of them.  

I tend to be hard on those around me because I know without doubt that if they asked me for something - I would do it to the best of my ability with no room for complaints or disappointment; and the reason I'm hard about it is because if it was the other way around - I'm more than likely to be disappointed by the outcome.  It's not as if that person is doing wrong intentionally - it's just that somehow we've all let our standards drop. 

To make my life easier - especially when dealing with the work culture of India - I've learned to just lower my expectations to ground level.  It saves me drama and time wasted on the phone giving the other person grief for just not doing their job.  When it comes to people - as harsh as it sounds - I'm the same.  My closest friends aren't included in this because we have an understanding that has developed over 2 decades.  I have no expectation from the new people in my life to avoid being disappointed.  Every now and then it's only natural that I do have some form of expectation and then I get a reality check and I'm back on the right path. 

Maybe this outlook works for me because I'm quite realistic about what goes on around me.  Maybe it's just too cynical.  I don't know - but what I can say is that ever since I have lowered my expectations of all that goes on around me - I'm in a better place.  I'm not getting annoyed or pissed off and my personal ranting sessions have definitely reduced according to friends. 

What are your thoughts on this quote ? Can you relate or not at all ? 



I've realized that it when it comes down to being able to participate fully in a blogging challenge - not only do you need some sort of 'theme' or thought process but your capacity to complete the challenge depends on the content of what you write (and in an ideal situation you would be blogging about topics that you actually LIKE) 

I'm pretty chuffed with myself because I've managed to put aside about 40 or so 'image quotes' that have caught my attention; and I intend to use  them through the course of the challenge.  High five to me for outlining posts up to a week in advance ! Woohooo !  If you don't already know my theme for the challenge - it's using 'image quotes' that make you stop & think. 

So my question to you fellow bloggers is ... what are you writing about during the challenge ?  Is the content similar to what you already have on your blog or is it something different ?  What do you enjoy writing ? How are you finding the challenge so far ? 


This quote is so me ! The thought of letting an outfit go to waste at an occasion that doesn't warrant it - is just frustrating ! That means that particular item of clothing / combination of clothing gets put into the back of my closest for at least a few weeks (if not months as has been in the case with some of my outfits). 

I'm the type of person who doesn't really like to repeat my outfits - particularly my evening wear.  This stems from the fact that I'm labelled 'paparazzi / paparazzo' by those nearest to me and tend to upload at least 75 to 100 photos from every day / night out.  This means that my 'outfit' has been seen by pretty much everyone I know - and this lil' diva isn't about to be caught in the same outfit twice with the same crowd of people (yes I'm that finicky about repeating my clothes) and within a time frame of 3 months. That's the minimum break any outfit needs if one socializes on the levels that I do.  

 I reckon most of the women reading this post will agree with me on the above quote.  Don't get me wrong - I have no qualms repeating my regular day-to-day attire; it's all my party attire that I get paranoid over.  What about you ? Have you ever worried about wasting an outfit ? Gents - I'm sure it may have crossed your mind at some stage.   Thoughts ? 
Last year during the UBC I wrote a post titled 'Stop Complaining' and it's no surprise that this particular sign / quote appealed to me. 

I have noticed that from the time I returned from my mini-hiatus in London last year - I've definitely improved when it comes to the amount of complaining / bitching I do about living in India.  Every now and then I will have a massive outburst because I've hit my bullshit tolerance level - and then it's all 'wooo-saaaa' again.  

I wouldn't say I enjoy my life in India 'more' because I'm bitching less - but it's definitely much more tolerable and I'm less disillusioned by it all.  I've come to accept certain things about the society and how things like idiot drivers on the road; and lack of professionalism are somethings I cannot change (and I will probably end up giving myself a stroke if I tried).  Besides, when it gets over bearing for me out here - I can just pack up and leave for a much deserved break.  

What about you ? Have you ever found yourself bitching about situations and somehow missing out on the moments that pass you by ? What are the steps you have taken to consciously not moan about things ? Do you notice any changes in your life since taking that step ? 

 p.s I will admit that I bitched like a cranky kid tonight at dinner at San-Qi at the Four Seasons Hotel tonight 'cos I was just not impressed with the meal (although not surprised, since I have the worst luck when it comes to eating out - my meal order always ends up wrong !) 


Where would we be without our hearts today ? How often do we really listen to what our hearts want ? Are you following the path that your heart wants you to go in or are you just going down a path hoping it leads you to where you eventually want to be ? 

The majority of the time - I do what I want to do as it stems from the heart. Every now and then I find myself blocking what my heart wants because my head says to think better.  It's a delicate balancing act - following your heart and mind.  It's during those times I am reminded that something is missing (and it's clearly what my heart wants) ... but it doesn't always mean that it is right for me.  It could be - but as we all know - the heart is full of emotion and the mind is logical.

How often do you find yourself battling between matters of the heart and the mind ? 
I thought it was only appropriate to start off the challenge with a quote that goes very well with my challenge theme which is 'Think About It'.


When it comes to participating in something like the Ultimate Blog Challenge - whilst it seems 'all good' and 'doable' when signing up for it - the trouble most people have is actually 'starting' the blogging process.

From the moment I saw this - I knew - that if I had to get out of my blogging rut; then I'd have to start somewhere.  Even if it meant getting back to regular blogging by participating in a challenge.   So for all of you out there taking part for the first time (and even those who are regulars) - we all have to start somewhere - and luckily with the UBC you have the support of thousands of other bloggers who are participating to keep encouraging you throughout the month. 

Are you following a theme for the UBC ? Don't forget to share your blog link in the comments below so I can come over for a read :) 

Happy Blogging Everyone and Good Luck with the Challenge ! 
The one thing I’ve learned in the last year of taking part in the Ultimate Blog Challenge is that unless you are a natural writer or someone who is in the habit of blogging every single day – it can get a bit difficult to find inspiration to post every day of the challenge.

And that’s where a ‘theme’ really comes in handy and can keep you motivated to blog every day.  My very first UBC was in Jan ’12 where I just blogged about random topics every day – and it did get hard towards the end of it.  I followed up this challenge by taking part in the A to Z Challenge in April ’12 where I focused on the theme ‘The A to Z of Blogging’ since each day had to be a post beginning with a letter of the alphabet. 

For this years challenge - I'm going to broadly go with the theme 'Think About It' where I'll be sharing quotes / sayings / images that have caught my attention and made me think; and hopefully will catch yours too which will in turn allow you to share your thoughts on the subject as well. 

 Do you have a theme that you are following for the Ultimate Blog Challenge ? Don't forget to share your blog link in the comments so I can come visit during the course of the challenge. 
I need to break out of this blogging lull that I seem to have fallen into.  I feel like I’m driving myself crazy with the never ending thoughts in my head.  The only way that I reckon I may be able to express a fraction of what I've been thinking is by participating in the Ultimate Blog Challenge October 2013.   

I took part twice last year which did wonders for my blog and helped me push myself to blog and express myself; and this year I hope to be able to just get on with it and hit my target of 31 posts for the month of October. 
  
There are few simple rules to follow if you are interested in taking up the Ultimate Blog Challenge:
  1. Post every day for 31 days (yup - that's why it's a challenge).  Doesn't matter if you post twice a day and then skip a day – but you have to hit 31 posts over the entire month of October.
  2. Each post must have a minimum of 100 words to count – so you can’t just put up a picture or a video and leave it there.  You need to actually express yourself in at least 100 words.
  3. Once you've posted, then tweet your post with the tag #blogboost so other participants can find you, and come comment on your blog
  4. Go to the #blogboost page and take the time to read other participants blogs (and don’t forget to comment!)
  5. No adult blogs – so keep it PG
  6. Have fun whilst you blog !

You can sign up over here : http://www.ultimateblogchallenge.com and enter your name and email address (this also allows the organizers of the challenge to send you across daily blog ideas and gets you listed on the site as someone who is participating)

If you do decide to take part in the challenge, please make sure you leave a comment and share your blog link so that I can stop by your blog .
Don't you just hate that feeling of being left in limbo ?  It's this uneasy almost unreal feeling. You're neither here or there; you're not going forwards in life nor are you going backwards - you're just exactly where you are.  You're almost blank - mentally and emotionally. Its fine for a while but then it just sort of sucks doesn't it ? 
Despite having a certain degree of routine and structure to my life - I've found myself in this limbo like feeling. It's a bit unnerving and unnatural for me.  I guess it's all to do with what I'm going through internally.  

 I want to do something to snap out of it.  It's not like I haven't tried.  I have.  I just seem to be stuck in a zone where nothing really seems to pull me out of it.  Some days it's a quick-sand type of feeling.  

It's an extremely uncomfortable feeling not being in control despite actually being in control.  My emotions are close to the surface and yet I feel they are buried so deep that I have to dig in just to be able to express myself.  And then, there's the temper that seems to be flaring up at the slightest of situations - which is unnecessary even for me. 

Where is serenity when you need it ? 
Just when I contemplated beginning to pen down my thoughts – my head started to spin.  A sharp swirling followed by an almost grinding type of feeling that keeps pressing into the brow bone until I have to shut my eyes and rest my face against the mattress.  The pain stubbornly refused to cease until I changed my train of thought and the feelings that came up with it.


Could it be that we can be so overcome with emotion over voicing our inner thoughts that we cause a mental block within ?  That’s just how I feel right now.  I can see the words and phrases floating around my mind; whizzing left and right - but when I attempt to pen it down – the process is almost excruciating.  The more I think about where to begin – the sharper the throbbing and I can feel blood pounding against my temple. 

I know I will find a way to express myself – I have to for the sake of my own sanity ... it just won’t be today.   
A couple of months ago - my blog was nominated for the Best Newcomer Award on the GreatDatingBlogs.com 

Thanks to all of your support and votes back in May & June- my blog has made it to the final stages of Great Dating Blogs 2013 in the 'Best Dating Newcomer' category !  Only 3 sites make it to the finals of each category so I can't begin to express how much it means to me that all of you in Bloggerville have taken the time to vote for me and my blog. I got this news towards the end of July but was not in the frame of mind to focus on this or even share this piece of wonderful news. 

Now it's time for the final round of voting and with your help, I could actually get to being in position 1 ! So if you could take a minute of your time and place your vote here for 'Dazed Reflection' -  I would really appreciate it.  Voting closes at Midnight on 30th September.  If you've enjoyed reading my blog over the years - please do share this with your friends on Facebook and Twitter and ask them to help a Diva out with a few votes right here at http://www.greatdatingblogs.com/best-newcomer-round-one-2013/

Much love from Me x 
  
This is hard.  Harder than I imagined - given that I have so many thoughts whizzing around in my mind. 

I’ve had a writing block for 3 months now.  It’s not that I didn't have anything to write about – it’s just that every time I tried – words were just not enough.  Throughout June all the writing I did was for my company blog.  It was a different style of writing which I enjoyed and found it to be opening up another side of my mind.  Then I was travelling from mid-July where I did get down to writing a few mini-travel blog posts.  The travelling enabled me to feeling more like myself - at least when it came to my own blog. 

And then with one phone call – nothing else really mattered.  I couldn't tell you when day became night and days became weeks – but what I can say is that it’s been a literal blur.  Imagine your world as you know it coming to a stand-still in the midst of a storm.  You stand with feet planted just so that you don’t become uprooted in a tornado of emotions that you can barely begin to comprehend. The whole time keeping your chin held high while you anxiously await a new dawn. 

The travesty is such that it becomes painful to see it penned down in black & white.  I will do it - but not today.