One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
- Rita Mae Brown
I came across this quote on igoogle earlier today and it got me thinking. If the key to happiness is a bad memory – then I am going to be a very unhappy person for the rest of my life !
I’m one of those individuals that has a very sharp memory – and if a memory isn’t right at the top of my mind when the subject comes up – I just need a few verbal triggers for me to get back into the groove of an actual memory.
I find it a bit ironic that a lot of times – when we look back on what we consider to be ‘good times’ – they also come with that deep feeling of ‘loss’ because those good times are no longer a part of our daily lives.
People who travel a lot and are constantly shifting cities / countries for a year or two; or those that have left their homes to go and work in other countries – away from their family, friends and loved one …. It must be hard right ? To have to settle into a strange place where your closest friend is still a few hours away by flight; to have to go out there and figure out a new network of people that you would want to spend time with and yet try not to compare them to your old friends.
For those of us who are currently single – it’s probably because we haven’t met the person who makes us ecstatic at the thought of just being with him / her. So when we have to retrace our happier days – we will inevitably have at least one memory involving and ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend – and that might bring a smile to our face for a few minutes – but also bring about a fast forward feature of your entire relationship thus causing some feelings of happiness, joy, fondness followed by a feeling of loss, pain or hurt (depends on how the relationship was) on the relationship ending. It’s only natural that this happens as at the present time – we’re single and have no new relationship to turn to.
For those who are married or settled with a partner – does happiness fade away as the years go by ? Or do you just let the memories go – and take each day as it comes ? I would think that for the majority of married couples – they would consider the bulk of the duration of the marriage to be a part of the happier times … Or do these quotes not apply to married couples ?
I came across two such quotes which both strongly advocate that if you want to be happy then a bad memory is a must … As funny as it sounds maybe it does make sense.
I find that every time I think back to my days in London – I’m smiling – and then after a while I end up feeling slightly down. Why ? A lot of my friends are there; I had this lifestyle that I don’t have here in Mumbai; the visual appeal of the city – the places to go and visit – which I don’t find so easy to do here in Mumbai.
Ironically when someone asks me ‘so why are you in India then’ – my answer is for my career and its a market with untapped potential. I do have a lot of fun here – and maintain a social life that most would be envious off – I have made some good friends as well and there are perks that I can only enjoy out here (a driver, a new car, cheap outings etc).
Therefore my conclusion here is that I’m happy being wherever I am because really I can’t be truly happy in any city as I would be missing the perks of the another city.
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.
6 comments:
I find happiness a little denial. Yes, denial. Somedays I need not know what is going on in the world. Ofcourse I have to listen to news and read my blogs, but than I get so busy that I don't think of the bad and feel good that I accomplished something.
I like the quote, but I would change it to "A key to happiness," not THE key. It's all a matter of perspective, and it sounds like you've caught on to that. It doesn't really matter where you are (I miss San Diego, for instance), what you've been through relationship wise (I think I've only truly been in love once. We were engaged, and she was killed in a car accident 2 weeks before the wedding), or stuff like that, because living in the past accomplishes nothing, and believe me when I say that comes from experience. Live for today, and for a better tomorrow. And in the end, happiness will probably end up finding you, without you having sought it out. Sheesh, been a long day. Did any of that make sense?
It sounds strange but i have read this quote just yesterday somewhere and was contemplating on it when i got to read your post. I feel one can be happy wherever one is, its just in mind
A great read. Love the quotes,.. both...
I also have an exceptional memory but I have coached myself into a blissful state of denial sometimes. I know temporary solution but it works so well.
About loss,... well if you have experienced what you would consider ultimate happiness and then lose it,.. then it is quite difficult to appreciate the other little gifts of happiness around you. It is like a drug, you would constantly chase the same high... Well, let me stop there... Don't want to scare off your readers.
Thoughtful and deep.. Nice read :)
@ Carol ... great approach - I should totally try it :)
@ Deft Digits ... Happiness is all about perspective isn't it ... I'm sorry to hear of your loss, it must have been very hard for you ... It can be painful stepping away from the past - but in the long run it works best for us all ... And you made lots of sense :)
@ WSG ... don't worry about scaring the neighbours - I might have already done that hehehe ... to our great memories :)
@ Arslan .. I'm not from IIM but I suppose I can come up with thought provoking insights heheh
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